How to Write Your Own Cautionary Tale

Nothing good ever happened to a person in a cautionary tale, and that is why we love them.

You already have a story like this. It involves your uncle, a canoe and an unwise shortcut. All it needs is a proper structure, and it can serve as a warning to your family for generations.

The five parts

1. The ordinary day. Begin with calm. It was a Tuesday. Nothing is ever wrong on a Tuesday.
2. The warning. Somebody sensible says don’t. A sign is even better. Ideally, both.
3. The fateful thought. Your hero says how hard could it be, or something very like it.
4. The consequence. Make it swift, make it funny and keep it harmless. A pond is ideal. Trousers are often involved.
5. The moral. State it plainly, in one sentence, as though it were obvious to everyone but the hero.

Three tips for the telling

• Use a very serious voice, which makes everything funnier.
• Give minor characters full names. Nobody forgets a Mrs. Agatha Thimble.
• Pause just before the pond.

Pass it down

Read it aloud at dinner. Make the children promise never to try it. They will try it, of course, and that gives you the sequel.

Start your first draft in My Book of Cautionary Tales, and if yours is good, send it our way. We promise to credit your uncle under an assumed name.